Concern from Far Away

For those of you that follow my blog and or know me well, you are aware that my mom is very sick. Back in August was when it all got serious. She started to loose weight rapidly, she lost her appetite and could barely keep anything down. They did test after test trying to figure out what was wrong. Then in October, things got really bad. Mom landed herself in the hospital for the first time. They conducted exploritory surgery and found NOTHING. THey ran some other tests and they did some other procedures and still nothing. Over the course of the next 2 months Mom spent time back and forth in the hospital and home on bed rest. Her last stint in the hospital was just before Thanksgiving. We thought maybe things were going to start to get better, although we still had no answers to what was cauing all the problems in the first place. Then, early this month they conducted an LP test on her and she took a turn downwards. She was eating less and less until finally she was not eating at all, because she could not keep anything down. As a result last night the doctor put her back into the hospital. He was going to evaluate her and decide what to do. They decided that they would use a feeding tube to get nutrition into her. The rest of the story I am a not sure of other than the text message I got from her which basically said that at some point today she had collapsed, while still in the hospital, and so her doctor had order her to bed confinment with medication and tubes in her nose. As a daughter who has always been very very close to her mother this whole situation is very scary. I think that it is even more scary right now because I am so far away and I cannot go see her and make sure that she is as comfortable as possible. It has always been my job to make sure that Mommy was taken care of, since she took care of everyone else. Granted Dad helped but still I always thought that I had to take care of Mom and now I cannot. I know that I have to take care of my wonderful, caring, super considerate and wonderful at taking care of me Husband, my dauster who I love always despite her toddler temper and her desire to be super independent and the new baby that is growing inside of me, but I cannot help but still want to take care of Mom.

My biggest request are that everyone keep my Mom in your thoughts and prayers that the Doctors may finally be able to solve the mystery and that she will begin to feel better.

Second, pray for me. I do not know if it is because of how long this has gone on or if it is the distance and the fact that I cannot be closer to Her or if it is the hormones from my pregnancy but I am having a REALLY hard time with this situation this time. All the other times she was back and forth in the hospital I was ok. I was worried and of course wished I could be there to help but I was ok with it and I knew that everyone was there for her and they kept me informed about everything. This time I am really struggling withit. I am emotional and scared and just plain upset about the whole thing. The hardest part of course is trying to keep my cool and stay calm so I do not cause any stress on the baby.

Last, pray for my poor husband. He has to put up withthis emotional pregnant walkign disaster.

I will keep you all updated as much as I can. Thank You for your thoughts, prayers and support!!!

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